Writing has always been one of Cassendra Doole’s passions ever since she was a child. “I carried around a notebook, kind of like in The Princess Diaries or in Mary-Kate and Ashley, having my very own Dear Diary moments,” said Cassendra. She was drawn to stories, both as a reader and a writer, which also led her to pursue journalism right after her A/Ls. Writing to her has always felt as natural as breathing, and she was pleasantly surprised to discover that she had a talent for it. “I worked as a journalist for a while before transitioning into PR. However, writing from the heart, especially emotional and personal pieces, has always been something I did instinctively,” she explained. Today, Cassandra has published a poetry collection of her own titled “The Haunting of a Broken Heart” through The Jam Fruit Tree Publications.
Heartbreak, of course, was the driving force behind this poetry collection. Writing has always been Cassendra’s source of solace. While reading served as her escape from reality, writing became her way of coping. The Haunting of a Broken Heart is a reflection of that coping process. The poet explained that if you read the poems, you’ll realise they aren’t about the romanticised versions of love with roses and raindrops but about the pain, the thorns, and the thunderstorms that come with it. Each poem is a tear shed while trying to “just get over it.” Writing these poems allowed the poet to release her grief and begin healing.
“My writing process is a bit unconventional,” explained Cassendra. “I don’t have a structured method. For me, pain often transforms into words. Once I write it down, whether in a notebook or on my phone, it helps me breathe easier.” The poems in this book span several years, and as she compiled them, she realised they were like puzzle pieces. When put together, they formed something that ultimately helped her breathe again. “There is one poem, “The Words”, that is quite important to me, because for a time, I faced a pretty intense writer’s block. And I realised I lost my words. When they were all I had. I told myself that just won’t do, and lo and behold, out poured a poem,” said Cassendra.
This book is divided into five parts, each representing one of the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance in verses that creatively shed light on the complexities one feels throughout the whole process with realistic vulnerability. This poetry collection covers every aspect of each stage and each section reflects a part of the poet’s emotional journey that ultimately led her to her healing.
The biggest challenge that the poet faced was finding the courage to publish this book, knowing that her family would read it. However, it is to her family that Cassendra has dedicated the book as well, beautifully mentioning how they stood by her as a constant pillar of strength throughout her healing process. “It felt like sharing my most personal diary with the world, and I was worried about hurting them,” Cassandra recalled. “I knew that when they read it, they would understand the pain they helped me weather was nothing compared to what I actually felt at the time, and I was afraid the book would hurt them.”
One of the most memorable moments for Cassendra was seeing her name listed as the author of a book, even though it was just a simple poetry collection. She remembered it as a surreal experience and how it made all her hard work feel incredibly rewarding. “I hope this book brings some form of hope to the readers. I don’t want to rely on clichés like there’s a rainbow after every thunderstorm, but I do hope anyone who has experienced heartbreak will find comfort in knowing that, eventually, it does get better. And above all, don’t be afraid of pain. It’s what makes life worth living,” said the poet.
Words by Gayanga Dissanayake